Here's to another year.

I'm sitting here reflecting on this past year, thinking, writing, and listening to my Friday Night Lights Pandora station--I should add that I'm also getting weepy and emotional...wtf is wrong with me?? HA! I think I'm sub-consciously thinking about how much I aspire to have the relationship that Coach Taylor and Tami have...What can I say?

I find it crazy how the years of my life seem to pass by increasingly quicker. 25 years of my life are gone. I'm on the cusp of another year, looking forward to another year to become a little bit better. Even though nothing "huge" happened in 2013, I have grown as a person. I have done incredible things. I have lived most days, the best I could have lived them. I had bad hair days. I tried to help others. I loved others. I was more aware. I traveled. I met new people. I experienced cultures besides my own. I was in tune with myself. I fell down (many times). I embarrassed myself. I forgave. I experienced pain. I pushed myself. I saw some beautiful I got out of my comfort-zone. I felt. I exercised self-control. I was stupid. I worked. I threw myself a party. I failed. I was true to myself. I did a few things I'd never done before. Yes, I'm still the same me, but I know I've changed. I have a whole new bag of life experiences to carry me through another year. Bring it on 2014. I'm stoked for you.

I have mixed feelings about New Years. Yes, of course it's a fantastic opportunity to start fresh, and set goals...On the other hand, I feel like LIFE in general is about progression. It's not just a new year--we're given a fresh start every day. It's easy to slip into a pattern of seeing life as 'monotonous'--un-eventful, or boring. Although our days may be "the same"--we are given those days to live and breathe, and once they happen, they're over. I've tried hard this year to have a passion for life that a lot of people fail to ever un-leash. A passion for LIFE--not just longing for the "big things" but loving the "small things." I've tried hard to relish the moments that don't come often. Just the other day I had the chance to help out a friend at work who was having a tough day. I made her come with me to the mall at lunch and get a manicure. Big whoop. Why don't I do things like this more often?? I remember the feeling I had when she gave me a hug after, and just said "thanks so much Monica." It's because most of the time I'm too caught up in myself to pay attention to how others may be feeling. It's little things like these, that I want to do more of. There are opportunities all the time.

This year, my goal is not to "lose 10 pounds"--because let's be honest...won't that be on everyone else's "New Years Resolutions" list? (and it will be there every year). I want to move forward--because we all know how easy it is to stay in the same place, and maybe even gradually slip backwards. Life is constant baby steps in the right direction. That's what I want. Baby steps forward. It's not a month of leaps and bounds, and then a few months of stagnancy. Life provides us with opportunities each day, to become great. We become great, through simple decisions. Each day of our lives, we are given opportunities to make choices. Opportunities that help us to in small ways, improve our lives.

I've sat here for a while, thinking long and hard about a few life goals I really want to work on: 

NOT BE AFRAID TO LOVE, AND BE FIERCELY LOYAL TO THOSE I LOVE

LIVE IN THE MOMENT, AND LET MY SOUL STIR A LITTLE MORE IN THOSE MOMENTS

KEEP A MORE THOROUGH RECORD OF MOMENTS THAT I FEEL HAPPINESS & JOY

BE MORE GRACIOUS IN WORD AND DEED TO THOSE AROUND ME

BE QUICKER TO RECOGNIZE GOD IN MY EVERY DAY LIFE 

SURROUND MYSELF WITH THOSE WHO BUILD ME UP

INSPIRE OTHERS 

FEAR GOD MORE THAN MAN 

CONTINUE TO DEVELOP A LOVE FOR LEARNING 

BE A BETTER FRIEND--CREATE LASTING RELATIONSHIPS 

Who is it that you want to become? Don't just set goals to DO things. I have some of those too, but I really don't think life is about what we do. I want to become someone this year. Someone greater. 

Here's to another year. I'm stoked that I've been given this long. I have been blessed way more than I deserve, and I hope to be able to continuously live with a sense of gratitude and passion for life. Cheers, and happy New Year everyone !

I've thrown in a few of this years' highlights in photos. There is a story tacked to each experience, but nonetheless these are some of my favorite moments of 2013. Life is so fun. 

straight from my heart.

I really like church. Sometimes I go, and it's hard to sit there for 3 hours. I can't lie. I'm incredibly weak at times. Sometimes I'm honestly WEAK. Other times though, like yesterday--I just seem to soak it all in, and everything I hear at church is as if it's a special delivery right to my heart. I think God works in mysterious ways like that. When I'm feeling particularly discouraged, God doesn't let me get too down on myself--sometimes he lets me be discouraged for a bit. Other times, it's a pretty immediate pick-me-up. I've never seen God, and I don't profess to have witnessed anything like that. On the other hand, it would be impossible for me to ever deny the existence of God. I'm guilty of often getting caught up in my own life, and what's "best" for me. I think that sometimes though, we all sort of "miss the mark". Maybe what's "best" for us every once in a while is to feel alone. Maybe God needs us to question who we are at times, and what we believe. Do  I actually believe in what I profess to believe in. I think sometimes he needs us to feel a little bit inadequate. He lets us be low. I think all these human emotions are so we can remember who it is that gives us confidence in ourselves. I don't know how, but somehow Christ makes me be better. When I think about Him sacrificing everything, so I can be forgiven, it just makes me want to try a little harder. That was my main take-away from 3 hours of church yesterday. Somebody talked about how much it would bother them if on their birthday, everybody else but him, got presents. He gave an analogy of how on Christmas, sometimes we give everyone else presents, and fail to really remember the reason for it all. What can I give to Christ, when we celebrate his life?? All I can really do, is try to give him my best. Try a little harder every day, to help others. To serve someone. To be a friend to someone who needs it. To think a little less of myself. It really, really resonated with me. To be honest, I feel pretty crazy just thinking about how much that simple analogy really hit me. I thank God, for giving me that simple reminder through that random guy who spoke in church.

Lately I've been reminded that life is never easy, but that doesn't mean that God doesn't play a part in our lives. Yeah, I've never doubted my solid belief in God, but I do have my low moments--I love this scripture from the Book of Mormon: "And I have been supported under trials and troubles of every kind, yea, and in all manner of afflictions; yea, God has delivered me from prison, and from bonds, and from death; yea, and I do put my trust in him, and he will still deliver me." There has never been a time in my life that God has turned his back on me. Nope.  There have been times I've wanted to turn my back, but after all He has done for me, I know I could never do that. Never. I'll always trust my God. I can't say that I can always, trust everyone... My Heavenly Father however; is the one constant in my life. Here is one last scripture from the New Testament I think is super cool--(1 Peter ch. 1 vs 7) "That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ" It's a hard to perspective to keep--that our trials can be more precious than gold. It's up to us, whether we allow the hard stuff to refine us. It's up to us, whether we blame the hard things on God, or we accept them as part of life, and allow them to humble us and bring us closer to him.